Warning: Spoilers Ahead!!! This is a recap blog which means I read the book and tell you everything that happens. Do NOT continue to read unless you want to know who the bad guy/girl/ botanical species is.
Tag Line: They're too hot to handle.From the Back of the Book: Valedictorian. That's all Marla Newman wants. But her chance is quickly slipping away. Then Marla meets two juniors who say they can give Marla the power to get anything she wants. Anything. But Marla soon learns that power comes with a price...paid in blood.
This book was published in 1999 and
this is my first time reading it. It is book 10 in the series. The
other books will be linked below.
The word 'episode' has lost all meaning now.
The beginning of each book gives us a
“yearbook” with all the characters. I'll summarize.
Trisha – lists her likes as
shopping and her dislikes as “rich girl jokes”
Clark – lists his likes as
Debra and his dislikes as garlic
Jennifer – lists her likes as
basketball and her dislikes as being a Fear in a Fear-hating town
Gary – lists his likes as art
class and his dislikes as cops
Kenny – lists his likes as
Jade and his dislikes as kids who torture camp counselors
Stacy – lists her likes as
sports and her dislikes as pyscho killers
Josh – lists his likes as
Debra and his dislikes as funeral homes (uh oh, that's two for Debra)
Josie – lists her likes as
standard goth fare and her dislikes as being compared to stepbrother
Josh
Mickey – lists his likes as
partying and his dislikes as studying
Marla – lists her likes as
writing and her dislikes as goth girls and the dark arts
Mary – lists her likes as
running and her dislikes as rich girls
Dana – lists her likes as boys
and her dislikes as “private cheerleading performances”
Will – lists his likes as
clubbing and his dislikes as the clinic
Clarissa – lists her likes as
art and her dislikes as Mira
Matty – lists his likes as
computers and his dislikes as “people who can't take a joke”
Phoebe – lists her likes as
cheerleading and her dislikes as liars and vans
In the last book, Josh, Mickey,
Deirdre, Gary and Trisha went on spring break at Trisha's ranch in
Tucson, Arizona. Josh ends up picking up the wrong bag at the
airport and accidentally gets possession of some kind of priceless
artifact that people are willing to kill over. Mickey and Deirdre
start hooking up despite the fact he's dating her twin sister Dana.
Josh falls for some girl that turns out to be one of the bad guys.
Deirdre goes over a cliff and dies. Meanwhile, back in Shadyside,
Josie and Jennifer get scammed by two college guys who just want sex.
They set up an elaborate prank in the cemetery where all their
friends dress like zombies to scare the two boys. The ghost of
Deirdre ends up making an appearance. Oh, and Stine blatantly rips
off both Child's Play and Scream. 👍
We begin with a prologue. Melanie (who is not in the yearbook and therefore does not exist) is brushing
her hair and thinking to herself that she has the bestest hair in all
the land when she sees two girls reflected in the mirror behind her.
They aren't actually in her room though. They just exist in the
mirror. She yells at them that she tried to play their game and she
did everything they asked her to do but she's done now and she's not
going to play anymore. They just silently smile at her like
creepers. She tries to run away from them but some kind of wire
comes out of the mirror and decapitates her. And then the prologue
ends. Like Melanie, I have no idea if anything in the prologue
actually existed.
Chapter one gives us Marla who
definitely does exist. She's eating lunch with Kenny and he's trash
talking her about a debate they're going to have in history class
later. She finds Kenny very intimidating because he's only one-tenth
of a grade point behind her and breathing down her neck for
valedictorian. Which is news to me because I thought Kenny was a
major fuck up. Maybe I'm getting him and Mickey confused again. She's dressed for the debate in a silk shirt and a
wool skirt because her mother has always told her that winners dress
like winners and she's feeling pretty satisfied with herself until
Clarissa trips and spills tea all over her.
Marla is enraged and she thinks to
herself that she wishes Clarissa would just fall flat on her stupid
face. In a matter of seconds, Clarissa does just that. Marla is
stunned and even more surprised when Clarissa gets up and accuses
Marla of pushing her. Clearly Marla didn't but Clarissa insists that
she felt hands on her back shove her down. She sulks off to sit with
Jennifer, Josie and Trisha.
Two girls approach Marla and introduce themselves as Elena and Roxanne. Ordinarily I would point out that they aren't in the yearbook and therefore do not exist BUT they're actually juniors so they wouldn't be in the senior section of the yearbook anyway. They're both dressed entirely in black and Marla instantly finds them creepy. They tell Marla that they want to be her friend because she's one of them and that she has “the power”. Marla isn't sure what they're talking about but Roxanne points out that she just pushed Clarissa with her mind. She basically tells them to get lost and they vow to make her sorry.
We skip ahead to the debate. Kenny is
doing a good job and Marla is afraid he might win. Her turn comes to
present her side and she opens her mouth to speak but nothing comes
out. She can't force a single sound out other than an embarrassing belch and she notices that Roxanne
and Elena are in the back of the room staring at her. The chapter
ends as Marla realizes she's choking to death.
{{{GASP}}}
LOLZ
She's fine. But she loses the debate
because she doesn't present her side. Afterwards, Kenny comes over
to make sure she's okay and she shakily tells him that she doesn't
know what happened. He's being really sweet to her and offers to
walk her to their next class but she gets pissy with him and drives him away.
Marla gets her test back in French
class and finds she got a B. Kenny got an A. She's really upset
that he seems to be beating her in everything today. When she gets
home from school she makes a list of all the people she hates.
Number one is Kenny for being so hard to beat. Number two is Josie
because she tape recorded the debate and played the part where Marla
choked up over the school intercom for everyone to hear. Number
three is Clarissa for spilling tea on her shirt. Numbers four and
five are Trisha and Jennifer who are pretty much guilty by
association. Six is Matty but she doesn't really say why other than
the fact that he's annoying. Seven and Eight are Dana and Phoebe for
ditching her at a party. Nine is Clark for being weird. I feel like
we haven't heard from Clark in a very, very long time. She keeps
adding people until most of the school is on the hate list.
Her mom rocks up and asks about her
day. Marla tells her she lost the debate and her mom asks to see her
French test. Marla reluctantly hands it over and her mom exclaims
that she's very proud of Marla's improvement. Marla is confused so
she takes the test back and looks at it. There's a 98% at the top
when she knows there was an 85% earlier. She can't figure it out.
When Marla gets to school the next day
she finds that somehow her hate list has been pinned to the bulletin
board and everyone has read it. Josie, in particular, is pissed
about it. She confronts Marla in the hall and Marla is humiliated
when everyone starts heckling her. Later in gym, she waits until
Josie leaves the locker room and then she gathers up Josie's clothes
and takes them out to the dumpster. She wants to make sure they're
buried under the trash so she leans in to shove them down. Someone
pushes her into the dumpster and closes the lid on her.
That's two books in a row where the
protagonist ends up inside a dumpster. I didn't really need an
excuse to stay out of dumpsters, but if I did, this would be a good
one.
Matty and Mickey happen by for some
reason and rescue her. She goes inside to shower and ditch her
smelly gym clothes. She's drying off when Elena and Roxanne approach
again. I mean, they could at least wait until she's dressed. This
is a little creepy. They encourage her to use “the power” to get
revenge on Josie. Marla tells them that she doesn't believe in
powers. They tell her that they used the power to change her French
grade and that they can teach her to use it to get everything she
ever dreamed of. Including valedictorian. Marla is interested and
asks for more details.
Roxanne tells her that they practice
ancient, dark arts that harness the power in the earth. The power is
strongest when there is a circle of three and that's why they need
Marla. They tell her to meet them at midnight in the Fear Woods to
be inducted or whatever. Stine decides to skip ahead in time and take us directly there. Very accommodating of him. When she gets there, they're wearing black
hooded robes and standing in front of a semi-circle made of candles.
They have her step inside the candles and form a triangle with them
around an alter. There's some chanting and some kind of cauldron
thing. I don't know. I just don't care. Marla gets freaked out and
leaves the crescent of candles. As she moves farther away, the earth
opens up into a giant chasm and she falls into the depths.
{{{GASP}}}
I mean, I think it actually happened.
Elena and Roxanne do some kind of chant and Marla finds herself
hovering upwards out of the chasm. Is it just me or is this book
extra stupid? It feels extra stupid. They teleport her back into
the crescent of candles but then immediately ask her to come back to
the edge of the chasm so I don't know why they bothered. They have her do a summoning chant and then a
piece of parchment paper appears out of nowhere. They tell her it's
her pact. Once she signs it, she will be given her powers. The
language on the paper is an ancient one and Marla has no actual idea
what it says. She's trying to decide whether to sign it or not when
she hears something behind her and see Elena coming at her with a
knife. Elena stabs her dead as the chapter ends.
{{{GASP}}}
LOLZ
She doesn't. She just wants Marla to
sign the pact in blood. She's even more unsure now. They continue
to tell her all the things she could have – revenge, power, status
– if she signs. She's intoxicated with the idea and signs the
paper with her blood. Then she tosses everything down into the
chasm. A fireball erupts from it and lightning begins to surround
her. She cowers in terror and then the chapter ends.
The next chapter begins with Marla
waking up in bed. At first, she thinks it was all a dream but then
she finds the spot where she drew her blood and she knows it actually
happened. Marla feels powerful and she even thinks she looks more
beautiful. Elena and Roxanne are waiting for her by her locker and
they're anxious for her to start getting revenge on the people on her
hate list. Marla isn't ready to jump into anything like that yet and
she tells them maybe later.
The day goes well. She's getting good
grades and the principal nominates her for the honor society. When
she gets to French class, the teacher pisses her off by talking in
rapid fire French that she can't translate fast enough. She wills him
to shut up and then feels her palms tingling. A tooth goes flying
out of the teacher's mouth and he stops talking and runs from the
room. Marla takes this as proof that her powers have, indeed, been
activated.
After French class, Marla is hanging
around the hall with Roxanne and Elena and her three favorite people
(Trisha, Jennifer, Josie) rock up. Trisha is bragging about getting
into Brown and Marla is surprised because the acceptance letters
aren't due for another two weeks. Trisha tells her that her dad is
going to donate a new student union so her acceptance was guaranteed
and Marla is furious. The witch bitch twins encourage her to use her
powers on Trisha and Marla does, causing her miniskirt to rip and
fall off. Trisha is wearing stupid panties and she's horribly
embarrassed. The girls encourage Marla to turn on Josie next. She's
standing next to the glass doors at the end of the hall. They want
Marla to “push” Josie through the glass but Marla isn't sure she
wants to actually harm Josie that much.
Marla heads off to the bathroom to
admire herself a little more. While she's in there, she feels her
palms start tingling and then hears a commotion out in the hall.
Apparently Josie fell through the glass doors after all. Josie claims
she felt someone push her but no one was there. Marla is horrified.
She tracks down Elena and Roxanne and they tell her that they can use
her power without her because her hatred fuels the dark forces. She
tells them that she wants to quit because she doesn't want to hurt
people and they tell her that she's locked into her contract forever.
Marla spends a fretful night but then
resigns herself to the fact that she's locked into this pact. When
she gets to school the next day, Roxanne and Elena are waiting for
her as usual. They tell her that she has until the next full moon to
kill someone or she will die in their place. She's horrified and
protests that she didn't know that killing someone was part of the
pact. They tell her it has to be the one person that stands in the
way of what she wants most in life. Kenny.
Marla stands her ground and tells the
girls that she refuses to kill anyone. They start acting scared and
tell her that if she doesn't kill for the Dark Forces, then the Dark
Forces will kill her and they don't want to be around when it
happens. Marla asks them how they know about this part of the pact
and they tell her about Melanie who was in our prologue. So I
guess that really happened after all.
Marla goes off to gym and frets about
how she might be killed. She gets stomach pain as she's doing
jumping jacks and imagines her stomach has ruptured. Then she climbs
the rope and she's near the top when she hallucinates that it's
turned into a snake. She plunges to her death on the hard floor
below.
{{{GASP}}}
LOLZ
She's fine. She wakes up in the
nurse's office. The nurse tells her that she just has a few bruises. She does have a couple of scratches on her neck
that Marla thinks came from the fangs on the snake. The nurse begins
to clean and bandage the scratches. Suddenly she grabs a pair of
scissors and holds them over Marla's head. A demon voice comes out
of her mouth, telling her to kill or be killed. Marla decides that
she's going to have to kill Kenny after all.
Marla drives to Kenny's house that
evening. She tells him that she's there to get help on her French
and he invites her in. He seems happy to see her for some reason.
They settle in the living room with Kenny's French book. He asks her
how her neck is and asks if he can take the bandage off to peek at
it. As he's doing so, she begins to strangle him. She can feel the
Dark Forces around her and she begins to chant something about blood
being power. Part way through, though, she snaps out of it and lets
go of Kenny. He's a little disturbed to say the least. She ends up
telling him the entire story about Elena, Roxanne, the power and the
pact.
Kenny doesn't really believe her until
she shows him the parchment paper with her signature. I thought she
threw that into the chasm but whatevs. She starts to cry as she
tells him about all the pressure she's under and how other people
treat her. He holds her and strokes her hair and tells her that
everything is going to be fine. Then he says that his dad has some
old books about witchcraft laying around – as you do – and maybe
they'll be able to find something helpful there.
They do some reading and Kenny tells
her that he thinks Roxanne and Elena lied to her. Nothing they've
read says that blood sacrifices would be required. He thinks they're
telling her that to keep her inside the circle because they need
three to have power. They can keep her with them by blackmailing her
over Kenny's death. She's furious and rushes from the house despite
him telling her that they need to do more research. She wants to
confront Roxanne and Elena.
She finds the girls out chanting in the
woods, as you do, and starts to yell at them about how they lied to
her and she doesn't have to kill anyone. They insist that the
killing part is definitely in the pact but then admit that they don't
really know what the pact says because they can't read it. Marla
says that they have no power over her and she's done with them and
they laugh at her and say now they have to kill her. I'm not sure
why. None of this book makes much sense.
What follows is a super stupid fight
sequence. The three girls use their power to move trees and throw
boulders at each other. Elena and Roxanne join hands and start to
chant and Marla feels her blood literally start to boil. For some
reason, she yells out that she'd rather freeze to death so the witch
bitch twins accommodate her and change the spell to freeze her solid
instead. Then they leave and Marla blacks out for awhile.
Marla comes to hearing someone calling
her name and feeling a warm touch. Kenny basically massages her back
to life or something and then the two of them start to kiss and grope
each other. I'm so confused. Why did I think Kenny had a
girlfriend? I bet they broke up books ago and I just forgot. It's
not like I re-read my own recaps. Anyway, Kenny says that the witch
bitch twins think Marla is dead so they can use that to their
advantage. Marla doesn't want Kenny to get involved but apparently
he's in love with her now so he says he has a plan.
The next day at school, Marla hides in
some kind of supply closet that has vents in the door. Kenny leads
the witch bitch twins to the door and then tells them that he knows
they got rid of Marla and now he wants to take her place in the
group. They ask him to prove he has powers and Marla uses her own
powers to rip Elena's backpack off her shoulder. They think Kenny
did it and they joyfully tell him to meet them in the woods at
midnight.
The big plan is to get the witch bitch
twins to open the chasm again and then Marla and Kenny will push the
two of them in. When he gets to the woods, though, the girls are on
to him. They tell him that they know he was faking the power and now
they're going to use him as a blood sacrifice. They grab a knife but
Marla uses her powers to make it so hot that they drop it.
This book is SO FUCKING STUPID. It's
almost over though. I can do this. {{{Deep breath.}}}
Roxanne uses her powers to make the
trees trap both Marla and Kenny. Then she tells Marla that she's
going to take Marla's power by cutting out her heart and eating it.
Marla does the chant and the chasm opens up and swallows Elena. I
mean......I think she swung and missed there. Roxanne is clearly the most
powerful of the two and she kills Elena instead. Sigh. Roxanne vows
revenge because the book isn't over yet.
There's another fight sequence. Kenny
puts a branch in the fire and tries to set Roxanne on fire. Roxanne
dips that and captures Marla with a tree again. She's about to cut
out Marla's heart when Kenny tackles her. Marla makes it sound like
Elena's voice is coming from the chasm and when Roxanne runs to
check, Marla pushes her in too. So RIP I guess. Kenny and Marla
celebrate with their lips and he give her his class ring.
The next day at school, Marla is
feeling pretty smug. She greets pretty much everyone and even makes
peace with Josie and Clarissa. She's looking all over for Kenny when
he comes running up, looking upset. He tells her that he did some
more reading in the old books after he got home and they have a huge
problem. Apparently if you kill “one of your kind” with the Dark
Arts, you'll die too exactly 12 hours later. Which is right about
now. The school floor opens up and tree branches pull Marla down
into the abyss. So....RIP. I could pretend like I care but I don't.
I'm just sorry she took Kenny's class ring down with her. Those
things are expensive.
So my manager warned me before I
started this one that it had the stupidest death of the series. I
hope she's right because I have two more of these to read and I'd
hate to think they get worse.
Marla was killed by her yearbook
dislikes at least. That makes up for a very small percentage of the
hell this book put us through. Maybe. Or not. I don't know anymore.
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